Saturday, June 13, 2009

School's out. for. summer.

I just got out of school.

I guess it's just a feeling of disbelief, ya know? Just the thought that everything like that was done, just in a blink. No big bang, no big "Suprise! You're out for three months!" No, none of that. I just thought. All the past year. The entire school year which just flew by.

Like I was on a train to nowhere and I was passing by some odd buildings in the distance. Looking back, I wasted some real big mistakes, some real big misses. I really somewhat think I should've thought it out more.

I should have done all my work, done all my assignments on time.

I probably also shouldn't have gone for anyone. I know it seems stupid, but I really shouldn't have looked for relationship, but it's all in the past. What hope does someone who thinks to be able to get someone. There never was a chance, so that's all aside now. I still hope whomever I once was fond for, can find solace and calm and love. Always.

I could not feel any better.

I've been described strangely, ya know. I changed myself this year, established myself completely differently from how I once was.

It's so easy when no one knows you at first, then you can establish self so much easier. Now look at me. Well, some thing don't change, oh well.

I've become so many things, a poet, musician, photographer. But, what have I made? What have I helped, who have I helped? I just feel like I'm watching over people, but not really doing a thing to help. Can't be helped, I guess.

Well, I still got my fingers, my camera, my music, my mind. There'll always be more to come, always be more to read, always more material as long as I breathe, I'll be thinking and I'll do my best to put it here.

What do we become?

Matthias, out.


bT said...

Dude, you gotta give me a copy of UNKLE.